Still Pissed Off About the Hawley-Smoot Tariff

Monday, February 21, 2005

SobekPundit Denies Rumors That He Has Arrested bin Laden

Having recently received a coveted Instalanche, I'm now shooting for even bigger game - the Drudge-o-lanche. And since I see he's prominently featuring a piece about Iran's denial that they have arrested Osama bin Laden, I would like to take this opportunity to squelch any and all rumors that I have incarcerated the terrorist mastermind in my Louisiana home. If you see any stories suggesting otherwise, feel free to disregard them.

In other news, the elusive pundit still refuses to comment on wide-spread gossip about whether or not he has "really spectacular tits."

Update: While working on a post about Lebanon, I was consulting some of my intelligence captures (I tap foreign communications lines as a hobby) and came across something you might find interesting. It seems bloggers weren't the only ones surprised by rumors of a hinted bin Laden capture:

[First voice]...almost fell over. What is this? I thought we were cool, Homed!
[Second voice] Well I don't know where the rumors came from, but we have obviously not arrested you. It must be a Jew trick.
[First voice] It'd better be. When I read that, I just about spit my margarita all over the ... [transmission garbled].
[First voice] ... camel had the sweetest ... [transmission garbled]. 'Baby got hump,' you know what I'm saying?
[laughter, transmission garbled].
[Second voice] Of course Kos is an idiot. But as long as he's so useful, we're going to keep sending the checks...

The tape goes on for several more minutes, but it's mostly just a discussion about the hockey season getting cancelled.