The Official SobekPundit Blogger Interview: John from Wuzzadem

In what I hope will become a regular feature, I've arranged for a series of interviews with prominent bloggers. The first is John from Wuzzadem, a conservative humor and political blogger from Olney, Montana.

Sobek: Thanks for meeting with me, John.

John: Thanks for having me.

Sobek: I understand you don't usually give interviews. Or, for that matter, appear in public.

John: Not really, no. But that should be obvious. I mean, if I didn't spend 23 hours every day in my little shack, how do you think I'd know so much about Hardball, Scarborough County, Judge Judy, Rock Star: INXS, and all the others?

Sobek: I see your point. Let's start with some of your classics. One of my favorites is your classic telephone conversation with Secretary of Transportation Norm Mineta.

John: You know, some people think that's a parody.

Sobek: Huh?

John: You know, they think I made it up.

Sobek: ...

John: ...

Sobek: I see. Anyway, what would you say is your biggest...

Clippy: Hi guys!

Sobek: Clippy? Excuse me, I'm trying to interview ...

Clippy: It looks like you're trying to give an interview! Would you like help
* Blatantly ripping off one of John's bits?
* Coming up with something original for once?
* Stringing two sentences together without hurting yourself?

Sobek: John, what's he doing here?

John: He just follows me everywhere, Sobek.

Sobek: That has to get annoying.

John: Why do you think I only post once a day at best? I can't get anything done.

Dave: Sobek, the interview is going well so far, but the audience is going to be asking, 'When will he acknowledge the band, INXS?'

Sobek: Band? It's just John and I ...

Clippy: And me!

Generic INXS Guy #1: Rock on!!!

Sobek: Do you guys mind? I'm trying to get an interview...

Chris: Don't play games, Sobek. Aren't you really just covering up for the neo-con Bushitler cabal?

Sobek: John, you've got to do something about all your ...

John: ALL OF YOU GET BACK IN YOUR BOX NOW, OR I SWEAR I'LL SHOOT EVERY LAST ONE OF YOU IN THE KNEECAPS WITH A SHOTGUN AND BURY YOU UP TO YOUR EYEBALLS NEXT TO AN ANTHILL!!!

Clippy: Sorry.

Dave: Sorry.

Generic INXS Guy #2: Sorry.

Chris: Sorry.

Generic INXS Guy #1: Rock on!!!

Sobek: Box? You keep them in a box?

John: Listen crocodile-man, don't push me. I have to deal with those little freaks every single day, so if you so much as breathe wrong right now I'll cut your from neck to nuts and turn you into a pair of shoes.

Sobek: ...

John: Girly shoes.

Sobek: ...

John: ...

Sobek: ...

John: Ha ha ha, I'm just messing with you, Sobek.

Sobek: Oh. Ha, ha. That's ... pretty funny.

Clippy: It looks like you're stuck in a room with a wild-eyed maniac. Would you like help:
* calling the police?
* finding a weapon of some sort?
* fleeing on foot?

Next Week: Ace of Spades